Ron is looking forward to the future and is focused on God’s guidance in his life.

This is the sixth story in a series chronicling this year’s theme of “Access and Opening Doors.” This month, we look into Ron’s story, recounting his journey to a new life.

It was long after dark and Ron was alone on the beach in Santa Barbara. He was supposed to have checked into a recovery program hours ago, but after drinking with friends he knew that wasn’t going to happen. “Once everyone had left, I remember looking out over the ocean and seeing the light from the moon reflecting on the water,” he said. “I felt like it was pointing me South and back to the Mission.” After praying and asking for guidance, Ron began the long walk back to Oxnard where he hoped he could once again turn his life around.

Raised by an alcoholic mom, Ron found refuge from the chaos at home by playing and excelling at baseball. “It was my safe place, and with school and playing dad to my younger brother, I was able to stay distracted.”

But as things got worse at home, Ron started running away. After he dropped out of high school, he went to live with his grandparents. “In many ways I was thriving away from my mom. I got my GED and began working in roofing and felt I was in a peaceful place at last,” he said. Unfortunately, Ron began drinking and hanging out with the wrong crowd. “I had been drinking a little here and there since I was 8, but things started getting bad once I was with my grandparents.”

When he was 18, Ron’s grandparents moved to Texas and left him the house they were living in. Over several years, Ron found financial security in owning his own roofing company, managing grocery stores and developing real estate. He was married from the age of 19 until he was 32. Yet he continued to drink. There were even times when he was homeless. “I never really got over the end of my marriage and eventually my drinking got so bad that I checked into a detox hospital. It was there that I first learned about the Mission,” he said.

While in program, Ron has learned healthy coping mechanisms for his trauma.

Ron entered the Life Recovery Program in November 2017. “If you saw the picture of me at intake, you wouldn’t recognize me. It took me three months just to clear my head.” Ron completed the program and briefly entered our Transitional Living Program. “At this point I felt that I had accomplished all that God had wanted me to at the Mission, but I would later learn how wrong I was,” he said.

Back in Santa Barbara, Ron reconnected with his old friend Lori. Their friendship quickly developed into more and they were soon married, living in a house they bought together. “My life at this time was near perfect,” Ron said, “and the time I had spent at the Mission had filled me with a sense of God’s purpose for me.”

After Lori’s brother died of a fentanyl overdose, however, life turned dark again. “Lori began drinking to cope with her grief, but I didn’t know the extent of it until it was too late.”

In January 2024, with a house full of holiday guests, Lori drank so much that she ended up in the hospital in an induced coma. She never regained consciousness and died shortly after.

Devastated from her death and overcome with guilt, Ron began drinking again and spent the next year in a haze. “2024 was absolutely the worst year of my life. I spent months reliving my pain and guilt and attempting to dissolve myself in alcohol,” he said, “and I almost succeeded in dying three times.”

After time in detox and his long walk back to Oxnard, Ron came back into the program earlier this year. Knowing what to expect helped Ron adjust more quickly than the first time.  “I was completely hopeless the first time around, but I came back this time with some of the skills I learned here in 2017. Though I admit I hadn’t really been putting them to any use for quite a while,” he said with a grin. “And this time I am committed to true recovery and not just making stabs at it.”

Ron also feels he is finally able to grieve the loss of Lori in a healthy way and not through a fog of alcohol. “I know she is in a better place now, and I know there are things in what happened that I can learn from. One of which is that we never know the hour or day that we could be called home.”

Ron is learning to open up to others about the things he struggles with and in turn, ask others to help keep him accountable. “I always managed to stay within myself when trying to make changes,” he said. “I just assumed that no one was really interested in what I was going through.”

He is also learning to deepen his relationship with God through prayer and Bible study. “In many ways I never went beyond just a belief in God. Belief is the foundation, of course, but I am beginning to understand how much richer and deeper my relationship with God through Christ can be.”

Reflecting on what his future might look like, Ron said, “I am definitely going to stay connected to church and to attend recovery meetings. Those things are vital and non-negotiable. Beyond, I’d like to return to my home improvement business and enroll in Bible college. I can see myself using my construction skills on Mission trips as well as being able to spread the Gospel.”

But no matter where his life is headed Ron will let God lead the way. “I feel positive, peaceful, and blessed, and I know this is all from God. I plan to follow wherever He leads me.”